Reward system

I absolutely sound like a fussy home schooler complaining about public education in the last few posts. I am just frustrated, forgive me. My kids could be in a much worse school system. In fact, there are schools down the street that are part of the city instead of the county system here that make most parents rejoice if their kids are in a county school. As I've said before, the county schools here and the one my kids are currently attending are very good. 


Here is an argument, less than a complaint: Why must elementary age children be constantly rewarded? I feel like my kids are learning that even minimum effort will be rewarded, and so they are working less hard. They have figured out the system. I didn't constantly reward them...their reward was an education. Their reward was new knowledge, a new book maybe. Now, especially because they are both above grade level, they do next to nothing and get parties and candy and toy prizes. I don't understand this system of rewarding to motivate. What happens when children grow up, and realize that adulthood, marriage, parenting, faith, and many other grown-up things have no rewards? Or, not the "prize" type of reward, anyway. What reality is this teaching? 


I read a post by Juliana over at Metanoia, and I think she's on to something, and it's partly what I am getting at with this argument against rewarding every tiny thing. She wrote:

"I have been thinking about how people (especially those in affluent countries) avoid pain at all costs. The moment one has a headache, some pill is taken (even if it’s an over-the-counter medication). We really cannot even tolerate any discomfort. We cannot stand to be too warm, too cool or hungry for any length of time (the candy bar must be had because we can’t possibly wait a couple more hours for dinner). I know someone who has a remote control for his car so that he can start his vehicle from inside his home and turn on the air conditioning/heat so that it’s a comfortable temperature when he gets in the car to leave. It makes me wonder how palatable Orthodoxy is to Americans or anyone from an affluent country. Can Orthodoxy grow here? How can Americans be asked to go without certain foods for half of the year? Can a culture that avoids pain at all costs embrace a faith that asks them to deny themselves anything?"


It is precisely this concept of avoidance of any pain that I am talking about, whether it's physical pain or mental anguish. We don't want anyone to feel that they are not comfortable. Getting bad grades in school? Not doing your schoolwork? That's A-OK! Just show a tiny bit of effort and you'll be having pizza and candy and extra play time. This is a distortion of love, and a lie to ourselves and our children. It is also sad to acclimate to, and then to realize that there is no easy path to knowledge, whether educational or spiritual. One small victory often leads to an even bigger struggle than before. I understand, sometimes, that this is the nature of a life following Christ. Yet, reward systems are in place that teach a love of the golden calf where gratification is found even in selfishness and that reward is always comfortable and instant. 


Of course, I just read Narnia again and I am reminded here that God's love is beyond our understanding. Aslan is the representation of Christ, and while he is revered and his abundant love is known by all who love him, they constantly remind each other, "He is not a tame lion." We are not necessarily rewarded in a fun way for our faith. Anyone that isn't lying about their piety cannot say martydom is the reward they seek. 

Help an Orthodox soldier hear the Liturgy and prayers

From the SGOMA fb page: 

We at Saint George OMA would like with God's help to do an pre-loaded MP3 player free for our Orthodox military with three Divine Liturgies recorded, with prayers, teachings, music (old/new), etc. Would you, your parish or your business be able to help with a donation for this project?

You can send your contribution for this project to us at:

Saint George MP3 Project

P.O. Box 778

Belen, NM 87002

918.346.5381

Sounds like a worthy cause to me. 

Not till next year...

Had a long phone meeting today with the APEX (gifted/talented) teacher. Looking at my kid's Stanford scores (refer to this post), she can't help me. Because Stanford 10 measures many different areas, while TCAP gives an overall score. They rely on an overall score of 90-95%.

She also told me that my kids are testing high on the periodic tests the school had given them (not an annual test, but tests in areas like math and reading). My daughter is not in 3rd grade, and while her math scores put her in the 94 percentile and she is reading at a 5th grade level in 2nd grade, she isn't old enough to be eligible. Ok, fine. She can't consider my son's 3rd grade scores because he didn't finish the "measurement" tests they have been giving. I asked if the questions he finished were correct, and she said yes. But since he didn't finish the test, he only scored 47th percentile. None of the other children in his class didn't finish the test. I was like...so...hmm...That's stupid. All she could say was that maybe he stopped and/or was confused about whether or not he should go on. I didn't tell her that but what the heck happened with him that didn't happen with the rest of the kids? So he is stuck with a 47 score, and therefore not eligible for the talented class based on that, even if she could pull some strings to get him in on his test scores, and she'll have to wait until he takes the TCAP and re-evaluate him next year. They don't recieve the TCAP scores until the end of this school year and therefore, he is where he is.

Really? This sounds very similar to the way our government runs finances.

Son, thou art welcome.

I was reading the Chronicles of Narnia again lately, mostly to get out of reading the drab science that I should be studying. To be specific, I was reading The Silver Chair and The Last Battle, which I could not remember clearly.

At the end of the Last Battle, a young Calormene (the enemy of Narnians that worships a god called Tash) named Emeth is found to be in the "real Narnia", when he was thought to be unworthy of being allowed into Aslan's land. I enjoyed reading this, an account of Emeth telling the Kings and Queens of Narnia how he had spoken to Aslan:

"Then I fell at his feet and thought, surely this is the hour of death, for the Lion (who is worthy of all honour) will know that I have served Tash all my days and not him. Nevertheless, it is better to see the Lion and die than to be Tisroc of the world and live and not to have seen him. But the Glorious One bent down his golden head and touched my forehead with his tongue and said, 'Son, thou art welcome.' But I said, 'Alas, Lord, I am no son of thine but the servant of Tash.' He answered, 'Child, all the service thou hast done to Tash, I account as service done to me.' Then by reason of my great desire for wisdom and understanding, I overcame my fear and and questioned the Glorious One and said, 'Lord, is it then true, as the treacherous Ape said, that thou and Tash are one?' The Lion growled so the earth shook (but his wrath was not against me) and said, 'It is false. Not because he and I are one, but because we are opposites - I take to me the services which thou has done unto him. For I and he are of such different kinds that no service which is vile can be done to me, and none which is not vile can be done to him. Therefore, if any man swear by Tash and keep his oath for the oath's sake, it is by me that he has truly sworn, though he know it not, and it is I who reward him. And if any man do a cruelty in my name, then, though he says the name of Aslan, it is Tash whom he serves and by Tash his deed is accepted. Dost though understand, Child?' I said, 'Lord, though knowest how much I understand.' But I said also (for the truth constrained me), 'Yet, I have been seeking Tash all my days.' 'Beloved,' said the Glorious One, 'unless thy desire had been for me thou wouldst not have sought so long and so truly. For all find what they seek.'

Page 757 of the chapter 'Further Up and Further In". At least it's page 757 in the book I have which includes all of the books.

Do you get the jitters every year?

Going back to homeschooling actually isn't as intimidating as starting homeschooling. But it's still scary!

It's constantly on my mind, I think I just might go crazy. :) In the face of my children's education, a new baby, helping with a home school group (in the future), and trying to (slowly, slowly) keep taking college classes sounds impossible. I tend to think things are less possible than they are until I start doing them, though.

Saw these lyrics on another blog, and I hadn't listened to our Rich Mullins CDs in a while. Do you know the song? You may not know the song, but you better know the artist or you're square.

Sometimes my life
Just don't make sense at all
When the mountains look so big
And my faith just seems so small

So hold me Jesus, 'cause I'm shaking like a leaf
You have been King of my glory
Won't You be my Prince of Peace

And I wake up in the night and feel the dark
It's so hot inside my soul
I swear there must be blisters on my heart

So hold me Jesus, 'cause I'm shaking like a leaf
You have been King of my glory
Won't You be my Prince of Peace

Surrender don't come natural to me
I'd rather fight You for something
I don't really want
Than  take what You give that I need
And I've beat my head against so many walls
Now I'm falling down, I'm falling on my knees

And this Salvation Army band
Is playing this hymn
And Your grace rings out so deep
It makes my resistance seem so thin

So hold me Jesus, 'cause I'm shaking like a leaf
You have been King of my glory
Won't You be my Prince of Peace  

 

You have been King of my glory
Won't You be my Prince of Peace

In the face of these things, my faith seems pretty darn small. Microscopic in fact. I have hope- we took our kids out of school today to go to church and I knew when we were there it was a great thing. If we homeschool, they'll miss far less.