Do you get the jitters every year?

Going back to homeschooling actually isn't as intimidating as starting homeschooling. But it's still scary!

It's constantly on my mind, I think I just might go crazy. :) In the face of my children's education, a new baby, helping with a home school group (in the future), and trying to (slowly, slowly) keep taking college classes sounds impossible. I tend to think things are less possible than they are until I start doing them, though.

Saw these lyrics on another blog, and I hadn't listened to our Rich Mullins CDs in a while. Do you know the song? You may not know the song, but you better know the artist or you're square.

Sometimes my life
Just don't make sense at all
When the mountains look so big
And my faith just seems so small

So hold me Jesus, 'cause I'm shaking like a leaf
You have been King of my glory
Won't You be my Prince of Peace

And I wake up in the night and feel the dark
It's so hot inside my soul
I swear there must be blisters on my heart

So hold me Jesus, 'cause I'm shaking like a leaf
You have been King of my glory
Won't You be my Prince of Peace

Surrender don't come natural to me
I'd rather fight You for something
I don't really want
Than  take what You give that I need
And I've beat my head against so many walls
Now I'm falling down, I'm falling on my knees

And this Salvation Army band
Is playing this hymn
And Your grace rings out so deep
It makes my resistance seem so thin

So hold me Jesus, 'cause I'm shaking like a leaf
You have been King of my glory
Won't You be my Prince of Peace  

 

You have been King of my glory
Won't You be my Prince of Peace

In the face of these things, my faith seems pretty darn small. Microscopic in fact. I have hope- we took our kids out of school today to go to church and I knew when we were there it was a great thing. If we homeschool, they'll miss far less.

So do we homeschool again?

My kids are two semesters into public school. They are in a reasonably good school system, with seasoned teachers who they've identified with, and a fair curriculum. I'm pleased with the school, pleased with how much they have enjoyed it (which isn't over the top enthusiasm, but general happiness), and have very little to complain about unless I try very hard. They have gotten easy straight A's and are on the honor roll and have gotten citizenship awards and etc.

My little, nagging problem: even a fair public school curriculum is nothing compared to a classical home school curriculum.

First, the kids have said they aren't learning history and geography. They essentially are not, compared to what they were doing. My mother in law, who has taught in private and public schools for a long time says that after 4th grade they will get into more. I don't see why they should wait...but I know why. The school is required and forced by state and federal regulation to teach to the middle. That's another gripe that I can't offer a solution to. They have social studies and map skills (read: neighborhood maps) instead of history and world geography. What they have learned about history this year has been- and even this was presented so basically and quickly they haven't really sunk into it- America is the City on the Hill and the jungle is over there. We were teaching them ancient history, moving towards medieval history, and had planned to begin modern history in the next school year. Of course, our idea of teaching history is far different than the elementary school they are attending. A few times I have liked a lesson they were taught, but it was touched upon too briefly.

Science is the other complaint my dear ones have had. They don't do science experiments. They have no hands on science. I know asking for this in an elementary school is probably reaching, because they have no funding for it, but why isn't it possible?? They have had a few "science projects" like research a jungle animal (public schools love the rain forest!) and my daughter had a cute field trip to collect tree leaf and needle samples and label them. Zachary, who is 9 tomorrow, mentioned that in the first two semesters of home school he had made a volcano, put together a skeleton and labeled the bones, constructed the organs of the human body and had a basic understanding of their function, experimented with floating, batteries, other forms of making electricity, conduction, condensation, etc. We did an experiment every week, he pointed out. "And they were simple, easy stuff to do. Not expensive," he noted. Good point, kiddo.

Their reading and mathematics is basic. They are reading several grades above but I must still push them to read everything. The literature encouraged by observing their peers is junk. I told them they are not allowed to bring home from the library Disney or Barbie or any such stupid book based on a movie or television program. What poor reading! Thankfully, the library has a lot of books and they have chosen well. I am not disappointed in what they're reading after we got what real literature is straightened out.

They must conform to state guidelines to enter into accelerated classes. There is a limited number of spaces for the accelerated classes, and they only go once a week. So my children must wait to take the test the school gives, since they can't take test scores that another institution gave. My children took the Stanford 10 each year but their fantastic scores there are of no consequence. Next year, after their TCAP (the state test) scores are assessed, they could possibly be placed in the accelerated class, bearing that there is room and that they test ABOVE 95%. This is the not the gifted/talented class I remember from my elementary years.

All of this is NOT to say that their school is bad. For what they have to work with, it's a nice school. What they have to work with is the problem. NCLB is a crapshoot, ladies and gentlemen. Terror of racial predjudice that removes gifted/talented and requires a certain amount of children of each skin color, and removes classes to help underachieving students, is ridiculous in this day and age. We're not helping anybody out by lowering standards and dropping funding for "extras" which were once essentials.

I am taking 15+ credit hours a semester for college to get through my undergrads quickly. I am pregnant with our fifth child, and now I am asking God and myself and my husband and my children:

What should we do about education next year?

God help us and be with us.

Photo of snowy church in Memphis

My husband took this photo of our church from his mobile phone at work last night. It has been snowing in Memphis, which is a shocker, and I thought the way this picture turned out was interesting. 

I kiss dem.

Before dinner Elisabeth points to a Christ icon and says, "That Daddy God Christ with book." (Christ was holding the gospel book) Then she points at the Theotokos enthroned and says, "That pretty Mama Tokos and baby Christ. I kiss dem."

Ella asks each morning to go to church. She crosses herself, copying her older siblings, but her cross is up, down, up. Close enough for a not even two year old, methinks.

This one might turn out ok.

Seeing angels

My husband recounted to me a great homily I missed while out with the toddler. He posted about it here, and it's worth reading. This is also a far better answer to why I cover my head than I could probably write.